“But what is memory if not the language of feeling, a dictionary of faces and days and smells which…”

from Douglas Moore’s blog Art of Quotation one that hits home

moorezart's avatarArt of Quotation

“But what is memory if not the language of feeling, a dictionary of faces and days and smells which

repeat themselves like the verbs and adjectives in a speech, sneaking in behind the thing itself, into the pure present, making us sad or teaching us vicariously.”

Julio Cortazar, Agentinian novelist


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things I shouldn’t do anymore: a slightly revised list

run to catch the metro
another will be along soon
and there’s no one waiting
at home anyway

drink more than one bottle of wine
the mouth gets numb
and you can’t taste it
or tell if it’s red or white

spend more than 15 minutes
playing solitaire
and try not to cheat
accept losses more than wins

eat hot dogs
for breakfast
that’s why they invented
cornflakes and yogurt

tell stories to people
half the time
they don’t listen
and it just makes me
homesick for my friends

talk to myself
in public
someday someone
will know enough English
to punch me in the mouth

display so many of your pictures
it’s pointless to have them
staring at me
from the bookshelves

love someone unselfishly
because next time
I’m going to be a little selfish
and expect the woman
to love me a little bit, too

vocabulary lesson

cut loose means
to let go
as in letting go of a person
of a group of people
one’s feelings change
not for the better
or the worse
just different
bar none means
without exception
I cut them loose
bar none
crumbling means
falling apart
not quickly
but gradually
as if termites
infected the house
the walls began to crumble
so that one had to abandon
that particular domicile
or one’s home
the place of residence
negotiations meaning
a compromise
trying to find the middle ground
if at all possible
when people are phony
it means not real, fake
than there can be no relief
or let up
and the only consolation
is a pat on the back
a sorry, sport
better luck next time
doomed means
it is over
to lose forever
whatever one had
or was under the illusion
of having
has become scarce
as in disappeared
leaving a void
or perhaps causing
a moral crisis
which can only be resolved
or concluded
by exiting stage left
or right
whichever leads
to one’s safe haven

 

a victory of sorts

sometimes you stand still
rather than walk on
and it works out
maybe not quite like
the way you anticipated
but not quite as bad
as it could have been
a victory of sorts
in a world where victory
is not just infrequent
but fleeting when it comes
so thank whomever whatever
you thank when you give thanks
and check out train schedules
for early departures
the next day

best remembered

in retrospect
is how I’m best remembered
present tense often
not easy to bear
especially here
outside my natural element
which is not to say
I won’t have another glass
of whatever they’re pouring
wherever I am
before moving farther
down the line
letting memory
take care of itself