on teachers & teaching & bigger hearts

Last week we had Teachers’ Day here in Turkey and I saw several postings on Facebook and Instagram acknowledging that and basically in praise of the profession and those who work at it. One cartoon in particular made me pause, not because of what it said exactly or because of who posted it (a teacher I know personally to be one of the most committed and talented ones I had the privilege of working with) but because of what it implied: that teachers have bigger hearts than normal.

Now I know I risk offending those who might read this and are teachers at some level of instruction at a primary school, secondary school, college, or university, just as I myself taught both high school and college/university, and though many of you might indeed have hearts bigger than average (like that teacher I know who posted that cartoon), I have to say that from my personal experience of over 30 years in education, not just as a teacher but as someone who created language programs and administered them, I found that teachers were not necessarily teaching because of their commitment to education or because of their desire to help educate the masses, but were in many cases there for reasons other than altruism. As one high school teacher told me early in my career, “I teach for three reasons: June, July, and August.”

Now granted vacations and flexible working hours, and this mainly applies to teachers in the US and in some cases in other countries, are attractive, especially considering that teachers don’t always make as much money as people in say private industry or other professions like doctors, lawyers, and accountants (though, of course, not all of them make extravagant salaries and also most endure extreme stress that teachers are generally free from), but those vacations certainly do give one something to look forward to. And, of course, many teachers do take work home after hours so those flexible working hours aren’t always as flexible as they appear.

But I’m not comparing working conditions here, just the size of hearts. For what that cartoon implied was that teachers have bigger hearts than normal, that is than most other people, and thus that translates to more compassionate, more caring, and kinder than others. And here is where I beg to differ because one thing those 30 odd years in education taught me was that teachers, and by extension administrators at schools, were not uniformly endowed with bigger hearts at all.

Now I have, as I like to say, had a rather eventful past and have done many things in my life, worked at several different occupations and often in a managerial capacity so my experience has been not only in the trenches, so to speak, but supervising others in the same field so I have a view of things beyond the actual job. What happens with many people who have only worked in one capacity in one type of job all their adult lives is that they develop a narrower view of their occupation based on their own experiences and those of the colleagues they have associated with. But I encountered many teachers who would schedule advising hours when they knew students were least likely to come, avoid committee work unless it was necessary for promotion, taught from the same syllabus year after year without change, did not seek ways for professional development, spoke disparaging of students based on race, religion, ethnic background, or gender, were more interested in the gossip of the workplace or of their students’ lives and picking apart colleagues than they were in empowering those in their classrooms.

I could give numerous examples but I think any teacher reading this can fill in with examples of their own if they just thought about it and honestly assessed colleagues either past or present they have worked beside. Granted, if one just concentrated on one’s own work in the classroom, and if one was as dedicated as say the teacher who posted the cartoon, then one might be apt to generalize, but generalizations lead to stereotypes which ultimately run the risk of bordering on bias and prejudice.

I certainly do not intend to “blow my own horn” because that is not necessary. I know what I have done both in and outside of the classroom, the effect I have had on many throughout my career, especially in the US where one could exercise academic freedom, and not just in education but in other occupations I worked at as well. This is not about me but about what determines the size of one’s heart and just who in life is a candidate for that acknowledged honor. There is no one profession that can lay claim to that characteristic nor one set of criteria for evaluating it. Besides, the size of one’s heart is determined long before one settles into a profession. One’s upbringing, the influence of family and environment, the kinds of friends one associates with, all these factors influence whether the heart grows or shrinks, and perhaps an occupation is not picked because of it but more than likely one picks an occupation based on aptitude, not how large or small one’s heart is.

I truly wish that all teachers have bigger hearts just as I truly wish that all mechanics do not overcharge, all doctors have great bedside manner, all police do not exercise racial profiling or excessive force, all military personnel do not kill innocent children, women, and the elderly, that all customers never get tempted to switch labels, that all farmers do not produce genetically engineered food products, that the rich all pay their fair share of taxes, and poverty, racism, and sexism become obsolete words in all languages, and that all politicians do not lie. But as optimistic as I can be, history and personal experience give me little hope of seeing that in my lifetime.

But back to the cartoon. I saw compassionate hearts and kindness bestowed by many people in the medical profession, law enforcement, social services, even restaurant workers giving food to the homeless and retail managers marking down clothing for single mothers and the poor, many individuals from all walks of life volunteering their time and energy in programs like the Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, Boys Club, the Salvation Army, orphanages, prisons, community centers, old age homes, hospitals, rape crisis hotlines, suicide prevention programs, etc. etc. etc. Bigger hearts than normal are not exclusive to teachers nor do all teachers/educators have them. People are people: some good, some bad, some indifferent. And most, I have found, operate on the principle of self-interest. So when it is in their interests to be kind or compassionate, they usually are. But it is not so common for individuals to be compassionate and kind all the time and to all people. My mother used to say judge a person by how kind they were not just to their family and friends but to strangers and even to people they did not necessarily like. Judge them by what they do when no one is looking. Just as a really law abiding citizen stops at a traffic signal at three o’clock in the morning on a deserted street corner, a really kind person does acts of kindness even when there is no potential profit, even to their egos. We are what we do, not what we say we do. And kindness and compassion, those very virtues that signify a heart larger than average, exist in many people in many different occupations in many countries in many cultures among the various religions of the world.

Perhaps I am overreacting to what could be seen as a harmless cartoon on a day dedicated to a profession that often feels it is not rewarded enough or acknowledged enough for the good work they do in preparing the young for productive lives in the future. But unfortunately I have seen too much pettiness and jealousy in academia in both countries I’ve worked in and from what others tell me of their experiences in the field, it is not uncommon. A close friend who is a tenured professor at UCLA explained to me once that academia bred pettiness and jealousy because academics had too much time on their hands, which, of course, explains why an assistant director at a Turkish college told me it was necessary to keep teachers busy at all times or else they would just gossip over tea. And pettiness and jealousy are not signs of a bigger heart than normal. They are signs, though, of small minds, selfish people, self-centered individuals. Which brings me back to the main point: only people who do not act with regard to self-interest but are truly other-centered in whatever occupation they dedicate themselves to have bigger hearts indeed. This has been true throughout all history. As George Washington once said: “The motives which predominate most human affairs are self-love and self-interest.”

And if that is true, that self-love and self-interest guide the actions of most people, then only those who can somehow rise above both those motives clearly illustrate what it means to have a bigger heart regardless of what profession they are drawn to. A principle, I might add, found in all major religions but not always followed by those professing to be religious. One only has to look at the state of the world to see that. And educators and religious leaders, unfortunately, who we have charged with ensuring that have had little impact on changing what seems to be basic human behavior. Bigger hearts are truly needed in us all.

 

on who to pray for

There is a post on facebook going around now with, as of this moment, 109,701 likes and 82,579 shares. The post reads: “SHARE AND PRAY FOR THE CHRISTIANS IN SYRIA!”  Then when you click on it, it reads: “ISIS terrorists have now captured Christians in Syria and told them that if they don’t deny their faith they will be decapitated and their children ‘burned alive in cages’. We must stop the ISIS terrorists!”  I found this somewhat disturbing for one reason but then after reading many of the comments made by my fellow Americans, I was beyond being disturbed and found myself shifting between anger and sorrow. But first, the primary reason I was disturbed in the first place.

Why does it take the threat of beheading Christians who won’t convert and the burning of their children in cages to get people in America angry? Where have these people been? Don’t they read the news? Aren’t they aware of the thousands of innocent men, women, and children already slaughtered by ISIS and the over 4 million displaced refugees from Syria that have flooded across the borders of both Turkey and Lebanon because they did not want to be murdered, too? And those refugees in Turkey and Lebanon are not just Muslims but Syrian Christians, as well as Jews who were living there and those Muslims are a mixed bag of Sunni, Shia, and Kurds because ISIS does not descriminate in their killing but kill anyone who does not swear allegiance to their lust for power and land. Where was the prayer campaign for them? Why wasn’t there outrage and a demand to stop ISIS before?

So, what got me upset in the first place is the call to prayer for the Syrian Christians and, by exclusion, no one else. Prayer is needed for everyone suffering in that war-torn region. Not just Christians. We, as thinking, feeling, compassionate human beings (and let me stress the word human) should be up in arms to protect every innocent person in harm’s way, regardless of religion, ethnicity, race, gender, age, hair color, height, weight, and shoe size. It is an outrage what is happening just over my adopted country’s border right now and all the nations of the world should, as one person commented to this post, “BAN together to stamp out ISIS.” They are, at this very moment, THE common enemy to us all. And it amazes me when leaders of nations bicker over who should fight them and how. Everyone should fight with everything in their arsenals right now!

My initial reaction, though, to that post was overshadowed by the sheer anger and incredulity I felt as I read the comments people were making. Here are some samples:

“But the children and the true Christians will not be his. . .they’re spoken for by our Lord Jesus Christ!”

”Thank you for posting. . .Islam religion of peace!”

“May God bless and protect Christians!”

“My prayers for my brothers in need.”

“Lord, we pray for these and all Christians who are persecuted and for our country taking You and prayer out of as much as they can get away with! Christians, STAND UP & BE COUNTED!”

“Stop Obama first before we can stop ISIS. . .Obama is ISIS.”

Strange logic that last one. Someone also referred to the Crusaders, which if they read more than the page and a half in their junior high school history textbook about the Crusades would have realized that those opportunists weren’t much different than the warmongers in the US who have made a huge profit from the unrest and warfare in the Middle East ever since the former Republican president George W. Bush decided to topple Saddam Hussein and bring democracy to Iraq. Iraqi Freedom, remember? All under the auspices of hidden weapons of mass destruction, not unlike the current campaign of fear being waged now over Iran by once again a Republican Congress. But this isn’t about that. This is about the same narrow, self-serving thinking that is typlified by this post. It’s okay if Muslim fanatics are killing innocent Muslims, but once they start killing Christians, well then it’s “awful.”

But there were some other comments like these:

“Pray for all humans regardless of race!”

“Pray for everyone in Syria.”

Of course not only Christian Americans think in such exclusive terms regarding atrocities. There are Shias who only care about other Shias, and Sunnis who only care about other Sunnis, and Kurds who only care about other Kurds, and Jews who only care about other Jews, just as there are people from every nation that only care about their country. And it is that thinking that mostly upsets me. Where is the humanity that ALL religions teach? Religions don’t preach indiscriminate killing (though there have been too many times past & present when people have done just that in the name of religion), only franatics do. And there are franatics in every religion, unfortunately. Franatics like those in ISIS. They are the enemy of us all.

And it seems to me there is a basic misconception of Islam by many Westerners. They are confused by its many sects or branches, yet how many sects are there in Christianity?  And don’t all those various Christian religions differ in their interpretation of the bible?  But what is truly sad in my opinion is this prejudice many Christian American seem to have regarding anyone who does not believe in Jesus Christ.

As for Islam being a religion of violence, if that person who made that comment actually sat down and read the Qur’an he would see it is quite clear on this. When mentioning the murder of Abel by Cain, for instance, it says: “Because of this did We ordain unto the children  of Israel that if anyone slays a human being—unless it be (in punishment) for murder or for spreading corruption on earth—it shall be as though he had slain all mankind; whereas, if he saves a life, it shall be as though he had saved the lives of all mankind.” (Chapter 5, Verse 32).

And when the Qur’an speaks of charity and compassion, it does not segregate people into groups of those who deserve it and those who do not but says: “And do good unto your parents, and near of kin, and unto orphans, and the needy, and the neighbour from among your own people, and the neighbor who is a stranger, and the friend by your side, and the wayfarer, and those whom you rightfully possess.” (Chapter 4, Verse 36). Which is why both Turkey and  Lebanon have opened their borders to over 4 million refugees from Syria without stopping them to ask if they are Shia or Sunni or Kurd or Christian or Jew. And the prayers here in Turkey are for all the dispossessed and the dead who have been ravaged by the wars that plague this land regardless of religious beliefs.

So Christian Americans please follow the teachings of that Jewish rabbi from an Arab nation who you claim to follow as your savior. Would he only pray for Christians? Was his heart so small as that?

the heart of Italy: for Carl

there is your sense of empathy
a deep understanding
of the foibles of the human race
reached no doubt
from your reading
your advanced degrees
your close contact with people
your ability to listen
as well as discuss
a wide variety of subjects
it always amazes me
the range of your knowledge
and though at times
your voice takes on the tone
of the classroom
and the professor in you
begins to instruct all
within the sound of your voice
it is never dull
and the warmth in your eyes
speaks volumes of your background
from the soil
of Italy
we were raised
and you embody all the qualities
that country stands for
compassion
intelligence
an aesthetic sensibility
you had strife in your life
an ex-wife who tried
though unsuccessfully
to poison your daughters
against you
and now you stand
a widower
mourning a wife you helped nurture
to academic success
a vast emptiness now
you are still struggling to fill
and you will
for women love you
you emit a musk
that they find intoxicating
it’s not charm like Chuck
but a sweetness
mixed with intellectual prowess
a safe zone to breathe
and you like to be the gardener
helping the women
you become involved with
to blossom, to grow
fulfilling their dreams
with your unconditional support
a Henry Higgins with heart
not a selfish bone
in your body
we had Chuck in common
who introduced us
and though I think the three of us
were only in the same place
at the same time
once
we always speak of one
when we speak to the other
my most cherished memories of you
are the dinners we had in The Village
at Hasaki
the sushi and sashimi
the bottle of saki
green tea ice cream for dessert
wandering the aisles of the Japanese grocery
up the street
afterwards
Rita and Barbara getting lost
among the rice bowls and tea sets
the food items
browsing among the shelves
at St. Marks Book Shop
which is not on St. Marks
but the corner of 9th Street and 3rd Avenue
recommending titles to each other
sharing poetry
bumping into Ren Weschler
tea at a tea house on 2nd Avenue
the conversation
the laughter
the warmth of friendship
the heart of Italy
in the smile
in your eyes